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It was a grand day for those enamored with the glamorous world of aviation history, as Civil Air Patrol cadets, Junior ROTC participants, and students with their heads perpetually in the clouds gathered around at the Spaatz Museum in Boyerstown, Pennsylvania. The occasion? A chance to bask in the reflective glory of U.S. Air Force Gen. Carl “Tooey” Spaatz, whose illustrious contributions allowed for not just one, but TWO entire World Wars.

The event was orchestrated by the Spaatz Association, a group consisting of both preeminent and not-so-prominent past CAP members who were lucky enough to snag the organization’s most glorified badge of honor: the Spaatz award. This prestigious medal, since its initial bestowal in 1964, has somehow found its way to individuals who grew up to be astronauts, generals, and admirals, making the rest of us mere mortals wonder where it all went wrong.

The high point of this extraordinary gathering was the debut showing of the association’s Lifetime Achievement Award, also known in high-flying circles as “The Tooey.” A mammoth bust of Gen. Spaatz himself, “The Tooey” stands as a colossal reminder of why some people win awards and others just show up to applaud them.

On December 12, a select audience (those who managed to keep a straight face) devoured dinner while pretending to enjoy a series of speeches from key association and museum representatives, topped with a Spaatz reenactor who offered a “stirring” portrayal of General Spaatz. Here are the highlights, in case you accidentally missed them:

  • Retired U.S. Marine Corps Col. Keith Seiwell: Waxed poetically about the museum’s journey from vague concept to standing edifice, presumably awe-inspiring, although no one took a moment away from dessert to verify.

  • Chris Boswell: Doing his very best Spaatz impression, Boswell regaled attendees with tales of the general’s life, making sure any embellishments served only to enhance the mythos.

  • Maj. Julian “Cosmo” Gluck: Transitioned seamlessly from reminiscing about his CAP cadet days to imparting lessons in being a bona fide combat aviator—because who doesn’t love tales of youthful bravery?

  • Col. Joe Abegg: Offered the crowd a buffet of career insights, from being an aerospace engineer to piloting Air Force commands and United Airlines planes, effectively ensuring no stone in the field of aviation was left unturned.

In an ironic twist of fate, less than one-half of 1% of CAP cadets achieve the Spaatz award. This elusive achievement requires conquering 16 CAP challenges and tackling a daunting exam designed to extract blood, sweat, and perhaps a tear or two. Only then can one join the illustrious ranks of Spaatz recipients—and later, find themselves at fault for having to attend these kinds of events.

After all, it’s not every day one gets to celebrate the man who first led the newly formed U.S. Air Force post-WWII and then retired to the less glamorous position of CAP National Board chairman, a role about as thrilling as it sounds—a fitting capstone to any legendary career.

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